A young man. A father. The young man runs away. Stays away for 10, 15, 20 years. He becomes very needy along the way, going from place to place, until he chances on his home country. The father has searched for him. He has also become very rich. The son arrives in the city where his father had settled. The son sees the father sitting on a lion-couch, wearing jewels and pearls. The son does not recognize him but is afraid of the man’s riches and powers and runs away. But the father recognizes him and sends his attendants to bring him back. The son fights back, but to no avail. They bring him to the house – he thinks himself kidnapped and ready to be killed. The father, seeing this, orders for him to have cold water sprinkled on his face and be set free. The son leaves and goes to a small village. The father sends 2 messengers pretending they have a job offer for him. The son accepts and joins them clearing a refuse heap. Then the father goes out and tells the son who he really is. He gives him proper pay and good food. But the son does still see himself as a poor laborer – so he continues to work hard for 20 years, staying in a small hut. Then the father becomes very ill. He calls the son and asks him to become acquainted with his business, to be ready to take care of it. Then the father reveals his son to all his staff and makes him heir to all his treasures. The son rejoices and thinks:

“Without any effort on my part, these treasures now come to me.”

(Saddharmapundarika Sutra 4)

A millionaire had two sons. The younger son said to his dad, "Dad, please give me my iheritance now." His dad gave it to him as he'd asked. Soon after that, the younger son went out to South America and wasted all his money living the high life. But when he'd spent it all, a
depression hit the economy, and he began to feel the pinch. He went to a local farmer, who had him feed pigs. He was so hungry he was tempted to eat the swill the pigs were eating, but he couldn't get any food. He suddenly realized, "My dad has lots of money and food to spare, and here I am starving. I'm going to go back home and say to him, `Dad, I have done terrible things against you and God, and I'm not worthy to be called your son. Please, take me on as hired help and treat me no better than that.' And he scraped together just enough money to fly back home.

But his dad heard that he was coming home, and met him at the airport and kissed him with joy.
And the son said, "Dad, I have done terrible things against you and God, and I'm not worthy to be called your son." But his dad had brought him fresh clothing, and had even cashed out some expensive stocks to provide a great party in celebration, with lots of food and drink for all the guests. He told everyone at home: "Let's have this big party, for my son was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found." And they began to have the celebration.

The older son happened to come back from a business meeting around this time, and he heard the music and dancing. He talked to one of the party goers, who told him how his dad had cashed out his stock in order to finance the big party. Then he got angry and would not go in. But his dad came out and pleaded with him. The older son said to his father, "Look, Dad, I've always been a good son. I've always done everything you wanted, and yet you have never gone so far as to throw a party for me and my friends. But as soon as your other son came home, after spending all your money on prostitutes and living the high life, you cashed out your precious stock for him."

His dad replied, "Son, you are always with me, and everything of mine is yours. It was proper for us to celebrate, for your brother was dead and is alive again, and was lost and is found."

Two stories from two faith communities. How similar they are – both talk about rejection and forgiveness. Of leaving and being welcomed back.

We all know what it feels like to be rejected, right? We have been rejected before – and it has hurt us deeply, sometimes even traumatized us.

Ever heard of the so-called ‘Chinese Rejection’? Having lived in China, I think it may be an urban legend, but the idea is that it is the most polite, face-saving rejection you can possibly imagine. For someone whose manuscript is rejected by a Chinese publisher, it would sound like this:

“We have read your manuscript with boundless delight. If we were to publish your paper, it would be impossible for us to publish any work of lower standard. And as it is unthinkable that in the next thousand years we shall see its equal, we are, to our regret, compelled to return your divine composition, and to beg you a thousand times to overlook our short sight and timidity.”

Nice, right? Unfortunately, most rejections are not like this. Let’s look at some real life examples:

DOLORES wrote to an internet forum on July 21, 2007:

I can't believe this. I'm too ashamed to even talk to friends and family. My husband has been unhappy with my 25 pound weight gain over the past two years (among other things). Two weeks ago, he left after an argument. His parting words were "Fat women just don't turn me on." I don't weigh 250 pounds, just 155. My husband isn't exactly Mr. Universe, but he thinks it's okay for men to be "a little husky." Has this happened to anyone out there? If so, what did you do to get over the absolute hurt of being rejected because of your looks/weight.

Rejected – because of weight.

Or take the case of Jack Degnan. In September 2007 he gave the following testimony:
Recently, my partner of four years ended our relationship citing my HIV-positive status as the main reason for the break up. He said he had been suppressing his discomfort with my HIV status and finally realized it was a problem. For a short while, I let this knock down my sense of self worth; I felt like I had a curse that I could do nothing. Over the years, I have heard many stories of rejection from people with HIV infection. Whether it be at the first on-line connection, in a bar, after the first date, or well into the relationship, rejection never feels good. Personally, I'm the kind of person who finds comfort in understanding why things happen and how people think. I am limited because I have never identified as an HIV-negative gay man. My first HIV test in 1985 was positive and admittedly, I can't empathize with what it is like for an HIV-negative person to date an HIV-positive one. But I can do my best to understand it -- and break it down. If I do this, I can hopefully avoid getting into the situation I recently found myself in.

In both my personal and professional life, I have had the opportunity to talk about this topic with many HIV-positive people, HIV-negative people, and sero-opposite couples. There seem to be three primary reasons why HIV-negative people are uncomfortable with dating HIV-positive people: ignorance, phobia, and a desire for unprotected sex.

Carina, 21, was brought up in a very religious family. When she lost her faith, her family turned their back on her. Here's her story: When I was a child I believed in God. My family were close and we lived in a Jehovah's Witness community separate from others who didn't share our faith. If anyone left the religion. I knew the effect disfellowshipping had on a family as my aunt had left the religion and went on television denouncing it; when my father found out he didn't talk to her for many years.

My beliefs started to change in secondary school when I became exposed to other ideas like evolution. I left home at 18 to go to university and my Dad refused to give me any financial support, as they don't agree with higher education.

I had a boyfriend at university. Someone from the religious group saw us and I was summoned to appear at a meeting with three elders from the congregation. It felt like I was on death row. I knew they were going to disfellowship me and I felt sick about what the implications were. After I was disfellowshipped, my parents didn't cut me off immediately but none of my friends could talk to me. When my best friend got married, I wasn't allowed to talk to her or go to the reception. I had to leave before the ceremony ended as no one was allowed to associate with
me.

I couldn't stay in my parents home for longer than 48 hours or the elders would remove my Dad's privileges in the congregation. My parents weren't prepared to let that happen over me.
Eventually I moved in with my boyfriend. When I told my Mum the news, she told me she couldn't have anything more to do with me. I was broken-hearted. I'd get upset at family movies, or when I saw a mother and daughter on the bus together. I heard my brother got married last year but he doesn't want anything to do with me. They just can't accept my
lifestyle.

I used to be really angry about it all, over how unfair it was. But in retrospect, I'm glad it happened. It's made me stronger and more self-reliant. Fortunately I'd made good friends I could talk to when it was happening, although I think counselling could also have helped if I'd had access to it. Above all I've learned you have to be true to yourself.

Real love means accepting people for who they are, not who you'd like them to be. Although my parents couldn't do that, I'm lucky to have found friends who can.

Rejected by her own flesh and blood – because she did not follow their faith.

On November 29, 2005, The Tuscon Citizen newspaper reported about the death from a stroke of Albert Soto, a Tuscon Actor and Community Activist. The focus of the article was not that he had died, but that his eyes and tissue, which Albert intended to donate, were rejected because he was gay. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has established guidelines allowing centers to reject donations from men who have had sex with men within the past five years, said Sara Pace Jones, a spokeswoman with the Donor Network of Arizona.

Finally, Joe, 22, from the UK. It was his sexuality that his parents could not accept. Here is what happened: By the time I was in my mid teens I knew I was gay. I was worried about telling my family; they aren't religious but they are very traditional. We weren't close and I didn't have much hope they'd understand. I was expecting the worst but prayed for them to show that they at least loved me even if they disapproved. After building myself up for it, I finally got them to sit down so I could tell them. I asked them to listen to everything I had to say before I started, but I never got to say it - my Mum just blurted out "you're gay aren't you?" and then they were arguing with each other. My Dad just stared at me, but he couldn't look me in the eye. Then Mum started blaming him for not being a good role model. I just started crying. I felt like dropping off the face of the earth. I wanted to take it back, but I couldn't. I just felt scared.

Over the next couple of weeks, they didn't know what to do with me. There were lots of outbursts, usually something like "how could you do this to us?" Then they just started to ignore me. The atmosphere in the house was agonising. Then one Thursday they kicked me out. Dad told me I couldn't live under his roof if I was going to live my life in a 'disgusting, perverted way'.

I headed for London. I wound up on the street for a short while before I managed to befriend some squatters. The place was pretty awful, there were cockroaches, but even so, it was better than home. It took a long time, but eventually I came out to the girl in the next room, and she was lovely. It was what I'd needed all along and I remember just sobbing in her arms. She worked in a pub and managed to get me a job there too. She's my best friend now. I tried calling home recently, just to let them know I'm OK. Dad answered and hung up when he realised it was me.

I feel angry towards my parents. They should have loved me no matter what. Being gay is a big part of me - how could they ask me to deny that? All I wanted was for them to accept my being gay. It still hurts that they think so little of me but I'm better off without them. To anyone going through this, I'd suggest taking a step back and looking at what kind of people your parents are. Are they open-minded? Even if they disapprove, will they love you anyway? If you have good friends then you'll need them to be there for you. It's a big step and you need support. If you get rejected like I did then remember that, as devastating as it may seem at first, you'll make it. Find support - it's out there. And know that you're right to want to express the fact that you're gay.

We all get rejected. Every day of our lives. And it hurts. It scars us – sometimes for life.

You know that when I was younger I used to love the cross? It made me smile to see someone wear it – wow, I would think, a fellow Christian. Not any more. When I see people at work, students at school, wear crosses around their necks, or as stickers on their bags, I flinch. I become extra careful. Ready to be judged. And rejected.

The world is full of judgment: Too fat, too thin, too short, too tall, too gay, too straight, too handicapped, too camp, too butch, too white, too black, too loud, too quiet.

We learn to fight rejection.
To live with it.
To ignore it.
To overcome it.

And the good news is that God is like the father in our story: Even though we have rejected him, even though we have run away, even though the world and everybody in it may reject us: He doesn’t.

He waits for us, with his arms outstretched, and a big colourful banner behind him that reads: Welcome Home!

It’s not fair, it’s not normal, it’s not expected, it’s not earnable, it’s not logical, it’s not unusual, it’s – God’s Love and Mercy.

We can rejoice in the knowledge that God’s door is always open, the candle is always burning in the window, it’s the one place where we will always hear a friendly ‘welcome home’ – no matter what.

But you know what? We’re God’s arms and hands and legs and hearts in this world. We, his followers, are to welcome all those that have been rejected and persecuted, discriminated against and done injustice. It is our job to set an example – to show them God’s endless love and compassion through our attitude and actions. That’s a big responsibility – in a world that has rejected God.

There was a man who had two sons.

(There was a God who, over thousands and millions of years, made a great creation, with a whole host of creatures upon an earth. And there came a time when one of those creatures came to understand themselves to be special in the eyes of God.)

And the younger of them said to his father, ‘Father give me my share of the inheritance that is due to me.’ And he divided his living between them.

(And the humans said to God give us our inheritance, and they plundered the earth with mines and drills and rigs, sucking out the black treasure, consuming it in their machines and spewing the gas into the sky.)

Not many days later the younger son gathered all that he had and went on a journey to a far country, and there he squandered his inheritance in loose living.

(A great economic system arose fuelled by deep level passions, based on conspicuous consumption and using the black treasure. The people travelled everywhere and nowhere. Forests were destroyed. It was party time. The air was filled with [pause] laughter. But the clouds were gathering.)

And when it had all gone, a great famine arose in the land and he began to be in want. So he went and joined himself to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed the pigs. And he would gladly have eaten from the pigs’ trough because he was so hungry,
but no one gave him anything.

(It was the climate you see. They hadn’t thought of that. And once they had, it was too late. The animals and plants began to disappear. The desert spread. The wells grew deeper. Water [pause]; anxious people [pause]; angry people [pause]; violent people. The rich built castles. The poor made battering rams.)

And then he realised his error. He said, ‘Why even my father’s hired servants have bread enough to spare, but I perish here with hunger. I will arise and go to my Father and say, “Father I have done wrong against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son, treat me as one of your hired servants.”’

(And a few began to dream of a home, they saw a vision of God surrounded by the creatures of the earth. They dreamt of living at peace with God and the creation and they set out to make that real.)

And he arose and set out for his father. And when he was far off his father saw him and had compassion and ran and embraced him.

(And I will leave you to fill in the rest of the story.)

And so to the people of the World that have rejected the father, that have squandered the inheritance, destroyed the earth, we say:

Welcome Home!

To the many Christians, in Singapore and beyond, who have lost their way, who are preaching messages of rejection and judgement instead of compassion and love – we want to engage you as our brothers and sisters, and we say to you:

Welcome Home!

To those that face daily discrimination because of the colour of their skin, their gender, their language, their body shape or their disability – we want to love you regardless because God loves you regardless and we say to you:

Welcome Home!

To all who are struggling with their sexuality, often rejected by their families and churches, without a safe haven, no place to run, doubting the living God because of all the poison that you have been fed – we shout out to you:

Welcome Home!

To Jesus, who lived and died so that we may live in Him, who did not discriminate but spread a message of love and acceptance, who these days is often without a home, without a community that follows Him – we want this to be your Church, we need you to live here with us, and we say to you

Welcome Home!

To you who have built this church, sacrificing time and money, who fill it with life and love, you who share your lives with us, who encourage us and support us and give us a better example – to you the people of FCC we say

Welcome Home!

To us who are in need of shelter, in need of reassurance, in need of love, to us who are doubting and fearful, judgmental and self-discriminating, desperately seeking for answers, every cell group, every service,
to us God says:

Welcome Home!

“Father, we thank you for your outstretched hand. After all this time we have spent away from you, following the ways of the world, getting hurt and rejected in the process, denying your name over and over again, not speaking up when we see others suffer, after all this time you say to us WELCOME HOME TO MY HOUSE. Today, we want to make this Your House, Lord, a house with open doors, open walls, a house full of Love and Acceptance, of Understanding and Activity. We have your promise, Lord – now we need your Presence to make your kingdom happen. In Jesus name
– Amen.”