This morning we will be continuing the “Experiencing God” series started a month ago. To prepare for this sermon, I struggled the entire week trying to crack my brains to think what to share today. What angle should I take? Sociologically? Theologically? Apologetically? I went back through many years of sermon notes scouring through concepts and sermons just looking for that angle, or that 3 points that would unlock God's truth for us this morning.

I even wrote out 2 different sermons packed with concepts and scripture and understanding, when I realized at exactly 11.30pm last night what I was doing wrong. In my business and my wanting to come across as profound and clever, I had been ignoring the constant prompting of the Holy Spirit the entire day. Each time I'd say a quick and increasingly desperate prayer to help me with the sermon, He would respond with a single word in my spirit – just “share”. At first, I thought “share” what? Who on earth wants to hear my testimony? Then it hit home.

So rather than trying to be all clever this morning, I thought what I would do instead would be to just share with you my testimony through my journey and experiences with God. Just like what the authors of the Bible did, when share their experience through scripture.

Scripture and the Bible

But before I get into that, I want to talk a bit about “scripture”. Now, when we look at scripture in the Bible, we often encounter 2 problems. The first problem is what we often read in Scripture is coloured by the condition of our hearts.

To illustrate this, would you turn your Bibles with me to Luke 10 verse 25.

Luke 10:25 (NIV)
On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”

So there was a man in Luke 10:25 who comes to Jesus who is described as an expert in the law. He understands all the legalese of word of God and has been entrusted to preserve its letter of the Word. In that portion of scripture, he comes to Jesus and he says, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”

Now Jesus' response was interesting in verse 26. He's talking here to a man who knows the scripture, and Jesus asks him a question: “what is it written in the law?” So Jesus refers the man back to his own knowledge since he's an expert in the law. But then he adds these words: “how do you read it?” And that's an important question. Because you can talk to 10 different Christians discussing this verse and get 10 different opinions or interpretations on the same verse.

This is so critical. Why would Jesus ask the person who was an expert in the law and prided himself on what he knew? It was because his training gave him a certain perspective. In fact, it would be that when he would read that law, his conclusion would be coloured by the condition of his own heart.

Now another interesting thing is that when that man asked Jesus what must I do to inherit eternal life, he asked Jesus for the purpose of testing Jesus. Not because he really wanted to know, but he was actually trying to put Jesus to the test. So it was an expression of his attitude, he wanted to catch Jesus in some way.

And Jesus said, how do you read it?

There is a very important principle here. And it is, what we see with our eyes, what we hear with our ears, what we read off the written page is coloured by the condition of our heart. So if your heart is filled with unforgiveness, it's amazing how you will interpret everything through the eyes of that unforgiveness, with a spirit of bitterness and negativism. And if your heart is filled with prejudice, then you will prejudge everything that you hear, that you see, that you read.

And that's why there are people today who are entrusted with the word of God that will come to conclusions that are totally opposite to what the word says. So I want to challenge you today, and for the rest of your life as to how you approach and read the word of God.

Now the second problem that we face is that we have the tendency to take things that are said the in the Bible literally because we don't have a good understanding of how the Bible was formed. 

Now some of you who were with me when we attended the Bible Seminar about interpreting the Bible last year when we were up the attic above Mox will remember this. We learnt that the Bible does not stand for the “Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth”!

The word “Bible” comes from the word “biblio” (as in “bibliography”) which means “a collection of small books”. A good definition of the “Bible” which I like to use is the “Word of God given in human words in history”. This illustrates its dual nature . Having both a divine and human at the same time.

It is also important to note that God did not call the Bible into existence by going to the 40 authors of the 66 books saying, “Hey Moses, thus says the Lord and while I'm say this, write it down!” These collection of books come in all forms – poetry, songs, letters, historical narratives, prophecies, chronicles, parables, laws, genealogies written by different authors as a “ testimony ” of God working in their lives. And that's why the Bible today is divided into the old testament and new testament .

So back then there was a council that chose from over 3000 pieces of “scripture” that was submitted for consideration to include into this compilation. In the end, 66 books were canonized as the best quality pieces that would best reflect the character God working in the lives of people through the ages, of course with the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

One thing that Rev Yap said during that seminar that jumps out in my memory even today is how we are continually writing our own “scripture” today as a testimony to how God has worked and as we share our own experiences with God.

So today, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to share with you my testimony from my journey and my own experience with God, the important principles and lessons that I've learnt along the way and hope that you will draw a few lessons of your own about how you can experience God for yourself.

The Journey Begins

I grew up in a typical Christian family of 2 parents and 1 younger brother and from young, we all attended Prinsep Street Presbyterian Church together. I think I started attending Sunday School since kindergarten. Both my parents were serving in Church and they helped plant the satellite church “Adam Road Presbyterian Centre” where I served as the first pianist in a house no bigger than one-third of this hall.

Back then I served in church because it was sort of a fun thing to do and my parents also made sure I kept going. God to me then was a giant unseen jackpot machine who I would go to when I had a problem, especially the day before exams results were released.

I totally left the church during my National Service years and sort of went once in a while only when I had nothing else better to do. During my National Service, I continued studying by doing night classes and then went to London for a year to complete my degree. After I came back from the UK , I picked up my love for bowling and started playing again in the Singapore Youth Team and coached a few schools on the side.

One day when I was 22 years old, 8 years ago, I was attending a Wesley Methodist 7pm Sunday service with 2 friends from bowling. I had never attended the service before, but that day I had missed my usual 5pm service in the sanctuary so I decided to attend the 7pm, which was supposed to be a more contemporary youth service. I always liked to attend the 5pm service because firstly, it was short. Just over an hour and I could be out of there! No one bothered me, and I could slip in 15 minutes late unnoticed. And it would be just nice to head of for dinner after that! But that Sunday, I happened to be with my friends and we decided to go for the 7pm after spending the afternoon out together.

Now I don't remember anything about that particular service, except the preacher. She was a big white woman from South Africa called Pastor Maureen Onions. I don't remember anything about the sermon. But what I do remember is her giving an altar call to those who wanted to respond to Christ, and me walking down the aisle the front with tears in my eyes, and a heart of brokenness and repentance just responding to love and presence of God in that place.

That day I experienced God for the first time as I cried buckets at the altar and was being prayed over. And the amazing thing for me was that after I returned to my seat I realized that I was the only person who responded to the altar call that day. What a setup! Imagine, an altar call just for you!

But I learnt an important lesson that day - God responds to humility and brokenness. That day, was the first time in my life I laid aside my pride and just approached him in complete surrender.

Psalm 51:17 says, “The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart – These O God, You will not despise.” So maybe for some of you who haven't experienced God in your life, it could be your pride or attitude that is blocking you. God responds to humility and brokenness. 

The City Harvest Years

One of my friends who was with me at that service happened to attend City Harvest Church off and on. The following week, he brought me to church with him and I felt God's love and presence just pour out over the place as the people passionately worshiped God. And I learnt an important lesson - when there is a corporate atmosphere of faith created by the correct attitudes of the people, God's presence can be tangibly experienced!

Now this experiencing of God in a corporate way is not some charismatic mumbo-jumbo that I came up with. It actually happened in the Old Testament when Solomon was having the dedication service for the new temple.

Let's look at what happened in 2 Chronicles 5:13-14:

2 Chronicles 5:13-14 (NIV)
[13] The trumpeters and singers joined in unison, as with one voice, to give praise and thanks to the Lord. Accompanied by trumpets, cymbals and other instruments, they raised their voices in praise to the LORD and sang:
"He is good;
his love endures forever."
Then the temple of the Lord was filled with a cloud, [14] and the priests could not perform their service because of the cloud, for the glory of the Lord filled the temple of God . 

In this portion of scripture, we see the presence of God come so thick and tangibly when Solomon was dedicating the temple. One of the big misconceptions today is that people have this mentality is that worship is for us; time and again I keep receiving comments like, “I never got anything out of worship today!” As if the worship was for us in the first place. No, worship is for God! Not for us! Having a relevant kind of music and words only helps us to unlock that song of praise and adoration in our hearts!

But when we come to worship with the right attitude and God's presence is tangibly experienced, when we bring our tears and brokenness before God, there will be “times of refreshing”, and we will find peace as we focus on God and exchange our burdens for His. He said that his yoke is easy and his burden is light!

Being a brand new Christian then, I attended many foundation classes and Bible Study classes and I found my attitude changing as I responded and acted on the Word each week.

Romans 12:2 tells us:

Romans 12:2 (NIV)
“But do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

“Conformed” here is the word “suschematizo” (soos-khay-mat-id-zoe) which means modeling or patterning oneself to the outward culture or social order.

So for the next 7 years, I grew in my understanding and strength of who I was in Christ, and the authority and power that came from a correct understanding of my position in Christ through the work of the cross. And this correct understanding and posturing of who I am in Christ helped me in my inward growth and faith-building tremendously. I also joined a cell group where I learnt to be accountable to my fellow Christian brothers and sisters and began to use that authority to serve God in small ways.

In 1999, I felt called to go to my first ever Hillsong Conference where I received and confirmed my calling to the worship ministry. Now, I had very little to offer God – I only passed Grade 4 classical piano, had no contemporary piano, nor vocal, nor band experience at all! But I've learnt an important lesson, whatever little you have when placed in the hands of your Maker can become much!

Remember the story of the feeding of the 5000 in the gospels? The gospel of John records it like this:

John 6:1-9 (NIV)
[1] Some time after this, Jesus crossed to the far shore of the Sea of Galilee (that is, the Sea of Tiberias), [2] and a great crowd of people followed him because they saw the miraculous signs he had performed on the sick. [3] Then Jesus went up on a mountainside and sat down with his disciples. [4] The Jewish Passover Feast was near.
[5] When Jesus looked up and saw a great crowd coming toward him, he said to Philip, “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” [6] He asked this only to test him, for he already had in mind what he was going to do.
[7] Philip answered him, “Eight months' wages would not buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!”
[8] Another of his disciples, Andrew, Simon Peter's brother, spoke up, [9]“Here is a boy with five small barley loaves and two small fish, but how far will they go among so many?”

This was the only miracle of Jesus that was recorded in all four gospels! But the miracle would never have happened if that young boy with the few loaves and fish did not step out in faith and place what little he had in the hands of Jesus!

There's a principle here – we are each created uniquely with individual gifts, talents and abilities, so that when we discover our purpose when Christ redeems us, we can make a deposit in our world of what God put in us in eternity!

It doesn't matter if you can have a small talent for writing or singing or teaching or cooking. Everyone has gifts, talents and abilities that come from God just waiting to be released and used to bless our world in our generation.

I want to take a quick poll at this point. As you know, for the last few decades there has been an ongoing debate on abortion. People are divided into 2 camps, pro-choice and pro-life. Pro-choice people argue that conception happens only when a baby is born. Pro-life people believe that conception begins with the egg being fertilized by the sperm.

So let's take a quick poll. No right or wrong answer here. How many of you are pro-choice? You believe that conception happens when a baby is born. How many of you are pro-life? You believe that conception begins with the egg being fertilized by the sperm?

Okay, thanks. Well, God says you are both wrong!

Turn your Bibles with me to the book of Jeremiah and let's have a look at verse 4 of the first chapter. This is God speaking to the prophet Jeremiah.

Jeremiah 1:4-5 (NIV)
The word of the LORD came to me, saying,
[5] "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."

Conception does not begin in the womb it begins in the mind of God! Jeremiah had an existence before conception. Jeremiah's parents were simply chosen at that time by God to express Jeremiah into human society. The same applies to us.

All things are made from Him. All things are made for Him. Therefore without Him, we will never know our purpose. When Jesus asks Peter, “who do you say I am?” And Peter replies that He is the Christ. Jesus tells Peter that flesh and blood does not reveal our true identity, only the Father does.

Let's dig a little deeper and stretch our thinking a bit more. You sci-fi buffs are going to love this one. Ever wondered what is “Time”? Or why God bother to created “Time”?

I think we can all agree that God dwells in “eternity”. So eternity is like a continuum, with no beginning, and no ending, just like a circle.

So what is time then? Time is simply a paranthetical insertion in eternity created by God so that man can relate to God in eternity. It's like putting 2 “brackets” on eternity to create Time – with a beginning and an end!

You're probably wondering, where am I getting this from? Where's the proof? The Bible of course! Let's look at Ecclesiastes 3:11. 

Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NIV)
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 

Yes, it's right there! Anyway, the principle is this: the unique gifts, talents, abilities, callings in each one of us are God's deposit from eternity to make a deposit in time.

Okay, so back to the story. After I received my calling at Hillsong in 1999, I came back and started serving in the back row of the choir and then helping out on the keyboards in the Chinese services at City Harvest.

All this while, I was also struggling with my sexuality, and went for counseling, deliverance to get the gay demon exorcised from me, and even had a girlfriend for one and a half years thinking that was the will of God for me. And at the end of 2002, I joined SafeHaven which started yet another chapter for me in Christian journey.

The SafeHaven / FCC Years

It was about that time I decided to come out. Now, one thing that I was never able to do while in the closet was to build one very important pillar of my Christian walk – authentic fellowships. I was always hiding this part of me. Many of the then close male friendships that I formed came out of a result of a sexual attraction I had for guys. And in City Harvest, while I didn't live a double life, it was a very, very guarded one.

But at the end of 2002, I realized that I had to deal with this issue, so I started reasoning with God (like in Isaiah 1:18) and engaging my pastors and attending SafeHaven on the side. Actually there's a principle here I want to have us think about: our view of God becomes the foundation through which we see life.

Let me illustrate this from John 10:10. Now the reason Jesus said: “the thief comes to steal kill and destroy but I have come so that you have life” is because for a long time, people had him confused with the devil! You don't have make a distinction if it was commonly understood, but because man always blamed God for destruction and death and all the bad things that happen in human society, so someone had to come and say, “it's not me”.

So if you see God as someone who only wants to take from you and oppress you, then you'll see everything and explain everything in life through that world view.

But if you see God as the giver of life, as the God of empowerment, the God who lifts the oppressed, the God who empowers you to do all things through his Christ, the God who gives birth to you and by that birth makes you more than a conqueror, your world view changes and your experience in life changes!

So that was my big coming out – I told my close friends, my pastors in church, and my parents. And like all coming out, it is never easy. But it was incredibly liberating. Not liberating like I could do what ever I want to, but not hiding in the shadows gave me the ability to start building proper friendships and authentic fellowship with fellow Christians.

Last year, I felt that God wanted me to go to Hillsong again. And from my experience in Australia , I receive and confirmed my calling to be involved in the leadership and teaching ministry at FCC.

Now, this is probably the hardest thing I have ever done. It is a big stretch for me because I am by nature an introverted thinking kind of person, not exactly your preacher material. I also don't have formal bible school training like many of you out there, but I decided to respond to God's call and here I am and I thank God for such an amazing journey of being able to walk with him and experience Him.

I think the biggest thing for me this year just experiencing how God is moving in FCC was receiving a revelation about the life and purpose of a church - that Jesus never came to save Christians, but everyone. And that the gospel of Jesus Christ is not just “salvatory”, but social as well.

Why? Because when the gospel impacts a human life, it so changes that human life that it affects the society in which that individual lives.

When you take a prostitute off the street, give her dignity, self-esteem, self-worth and bring the truth of God's Word to her and let her understand there is a destiny and purpose to her life, that there's a gift and talent that God has placed in her from eternity, it does something not only to that woman, it does something to all the people who knew her before Christ, and all the people she interacts with and shares her life with after she has a revelation of who she is in Christ.

And what is true for her is true for the drug addict, the chronically depressed person, the gambling addict, the wife-beater and the list goes on.

So Jesus did not just save us for us to flourish in the Church and cocoon ourselves, instead he said go ye into all the world and take this Message. All you students of the Bible out there will know that the word “world” is “cosmos”, which is the order and arrangement of things. This includes political arrangement, social order, economic order, spiritual order, and political order of things.

Taking the Message into the world goes far beyond just a nice message preached in Sunday School, or church service, it is meant to absolutely revolutionize human society! That is the reason why I believe that it is absolutely critical that we never allow ourselves to limit a limitless God because our limited understanding of God or what years of being in Church has conditioned us to believe.

In closing, if we really want to experience God, it has to start with coming to God in absolute humility to receive salvation that is only available through Jesus Christ. But it does not end there. No, no, that's just the beginning of the journey! I've learnt that God then begins to deal with us bit by bit on the inside, so that we can reflect Him more and more and be more and more effective in doing His will that was set about in eternity on the outside.

And it is my honour and privilege to have each one of you with me on this journey as we experience God together at FCC.