Free Community Church

1st Song: Let’s talk about me

Let’s talk about me -

The things that are me.

Learn more about me:

Love having things fast,

And getting it free!

Now keep up with me

And you will see

There’s so much more about me.

And that’s what makes me, me.

Talik says:

I am fat. I have always been fat. My mum says I was such a cute chubby baby. I just love food. Anything deep-fried. Chocolate. Ice cream. The kids at school call me names. Fattie. Blob. Fatso. I try to make some friends, but nobody wants to sit with me during lunch. So I sit alone, and eat what mum packed me. Then I go to the corner-store and buy some ice cream. Or a Kinder bueno. Or two. Or three. When I eat, I am happy. But I hate school. In sports, when we split up into teams, I am always the last to get chosen. Even the girls get selected before me. That feels really bad. And all I want to do is go home. Watch TV and eat.

Talik says: I am not worthy.

Jesus says:

I have known you before you were born. You were made in the image of my father. You are special. It doesn’t matter if you’re skinny or big. To me you are beautiful. I love you, Talik.

Shu Li says:

I love girls. I always have, as long as I can remember. When I had the first crush on another girl, in school, I thought it was normal. We all had crushes on each other. But after a while the other girls started to get interested in boys. Only I didn’t. I realized that it is not normal. I am not normal. Then, when I was 16, I left my diary in class. The other girls found it and were reading it aloud when I came back in. I tried to get it back but they threw it around and were reading from it. All my secret thoughts, my crushes, the poems I had written to some girls in class but never sent. Out in the open. I was crying so much, they finally returned the diary. I locked myself in the toilet until I couldn’t cry any more. From that day, I knew that I had to hide. That I cannot show my love. That I will never marry. That I will never be happy. If my mum knew, it would break her heart – she is already making plans for my wedding. What wedding? If dad knew, he’d kill me. I read articles in the papers of how we are perverted. How we can’t become teachers. In church the pastor says people like me are an abomination. I am not sure what that means, but the way he says it, it sounds bad. Sometimes I get so sad I want to kill myself.

Shu Li says: I am not worthy.

Jesus says:

There will be times when people despise you. Because you are different. Because you are not like them. To me, that is not important. To me, our father created you just the way you are. Who you love doesn’t matter. What matters is what is in your heart. What matters is how you treat the people that you are with. Love is all that matters. I love you, Shu Li.

Yusof says:

We don’t have money. I live in one room together with mum and my three sisters. Dad left one day and never came back. I asked mum where he went but mum just cries. I hate to see her cry. She goes to the market every day to try and get some rotten fruits, some old vegetables for us to eat. Before, I went to school, but then I had to stop because I must try and earn some money. I run errants for some shopowners in the neighbourhood – sometimes I sit by the roadside and clean the shoes of the rich people that walk by. But not many need their shoes cleaned. Mum says I must still try to learn, or I will never have a future. She says I must help feed the family, that I am now the only man in the house. Sometimes I think stealing would be easier. Or to join one of the gangs in our neighbourhood. They always have food, even cigarettes. Sometimes I think this will never change.

Yusof says: I am not worthy.

Jesus says:

I know you are poor. You have a hard life. I am sending my angels to take care of you. I have told them to find you and to help you. They will help me make this world a better place, for everybody. I am looking forward to seeing you. I love you, Yusof.

You

You – I – we are products of society. We learn what is good and bad, right and wrong, normal and weird. We hardly ever question these values – we subject ourselves to them because everybody else does, because we are intellectually lazy, because we want to fit in, because we don’t have an alternative. Even if those judgments, those “morals”, are used against us, we don’t question, never challenge them – or if we do, just on the surface, just selectively. Deeply influenced by the teachings of Confucius, we follow our parents, our teachers, our governments and adopt their value systems – thereby denying ourselves, our own resemblance of God-the-Creator, who formed us as we are, with parts that happen to fit into the system we live in and others that don’t. We follow common judgment and deny parts of our holy humanity – parts that make us who we are, created by God. Deny, suppress, hide, compensate. Just because others, in whose company or historical succession we happen to exist, deem them wrong. Unnatural. Taboo. Freaky.

Song 2: Macy Gray - Sexual Revolution

everybody shake it
time to be free amongst yourselves
your mama told you to be discreet
and keep your freak to yourself
but your mama lied to you all this time
she knows as well as you and I
you've got to express what is taboo in you
and share your freak with the rest of us
cause it's a beautiful thang

this is my sexual revolution

everybody break it
every rule every constriction
my papa told me to be home by now
but my party has just begun
maybe he'll understand
that I got to be
to be the freak that god made me
so many thangz I want to try
got to do them before I die
this is my sexual revolution

Chuck says:

I used to have an apartment. A job. At some stage, after school, I even had a small car for a year. At that time, I was living with Lynn, my girlfriend. I had just started to work, just got my first credit card. We thought we had it made. I took her to Hawaii for holiday. We bought a Bang&Olufsen sound system – amazing. And I fulfilled my childhood dream – my own Harley. Then the crisis hit, and I was amongst the first group that got retrenched. Soon we weren’t able to make the credit card payments, and they came to take it all away: the Harley. The B&O system. Our car. And when we couldn’t pay the rent for the third month in a row, we got evicted. That’s when Lynn left me, and moved back in with her parents. She said she can do better than me. For a while I stayed with friends, but eventually they got a bit fed up with me sleeping on their sofa. When there was nowhere else to go, I went to the park. It’s ok, the temperatures are still mild, and there is a fountain for washing. Over at the Samaritans they serve soup every second day. It’s just – my biggest fear is that one of my old colleagues will see me like this. That’s why I cover my head when I sleep. I am so ashamed. I feel like such a loser.

Chuck says: I am not worthy.

Jesus says:

I know that living in this world is not easy. You’re only human, bound to follow the rules of the world. The quest for more and more things. Then when you lose them, you blame me. I am looking after you, my friend – together with the lilies on the field, the birds in the air, the whole creation. Don’t be afraid. I love you, Chuck.

Jeremiah says:

My name is Jeremiah. That’s right, like the one in the bible. A prophet, right? I’m not too sure. For me, I am ok. Well, as long as I stay in my neighbourhood. But when I go downtown or when I travel? Don’t get me started. Barak Obama or not, people are still racist. Best case, they stare. What am I, some kind of circus animal? Children point. And in some places, they start to pick a fight. Call me the N-word. Yes, it still happens. You’d be surprised. When I graduated from college, I sent out 10 job applications. Got invited to 6 interviews. They were all nice and all, but nobody offered me a job. The crisis, of course. Nothing to do with me being black. Sometimes I feel like I am cursed. This skin colour. It’s a curse.

Jeremiah says: I am not worthy.

Jesus says:

I feel your pain. People always judge – they hate those that are different. That hasn’t changed for 2000 years. But their judgment doesn’t count. It is mine that matters in the end. I have told them, and some have understood. And I am not judging you – you are my special child. I love you, Jeremiah.

Dana says:

I was born a boy – my parents called me Yaron. But I always knew that I am a woman. I told my parents when I was 13. And I always wanted to sing – so I dressed up in skirts and sang the songs of famous females. Finally, when I was 21, I had earned enough money to fly to London and get the operation done. I also changed my name to Sharon. Finally, I felt, I was truly me.

I continued to sing and in 1998 I was chosen to represent Israel at the Eurovision song contest. Man – you should have read the papers. Religious groups and conservatives cried Foul! How can Israel be represented by a transsexual! I can’t say it didn’t influence me. There were times when I wanted to give up. But then I remembered my friends, my music, and I continued. I won the 1998 Eurovision song contest with the song “Diva”. That was probably the happiest moment of my life. But with our country being what it is, I still get hate mail and some people spit at me.

Dana says: I am not worthy.

Jesus says:

I know people call you a freak. They don’t understand you – you don’t fit into any box. But you can be who you want to be. The important thing is that you are happy – and that you make others happy. Not as a man or as a woman – as you. I love you, Dana.

You

We – I – you owe it to yourself to question. Challenge normality, social norms, dig deeper and leave no stone unturned. Instead of being the obedient lamb, or lemming, you need to go back to your own values. Values that you have chosen for yourself. That you have examined, weighed, and deemed good – if for nobody else but yourself. But where shall I turn, you ask. It’s simple. It’s about finding your own radical normality. You know what radical means? It means going back to the roots, or origin. For us, we are rooted in God. We are children of God, created in His or Her image. It means accepting yourself, no ifs and buts, because God accepted you first. Not just accepted but made you. Denying holy parts of yourselves is denying God’s plan for you. Your own radical morality can be based on the teaching of Jesus. His love-commandments. If you find, if you feel that these are right for your life, they can form the basis of your new, radical life. They can govern how you see yourself, deal with yourself, first, and then with others. Based on your own acceptance of yourself, because Jesus accepts you, you will realize: It’s not you who has a problem. It’s those around you – those that follow man-made illusions of beauty, of morality, of right and wrong. They have a problem because their morality and their judgments are baseless. They are home-made. Once you realize that, and that it is irrelevant what they think, they will have no more power over you. You will no longer be too this, or too that, too gay or too black or too poor or too radical. You will be in love with yourself because God loves you. You will look in the mirror and say: I’m beautiful – inside and out.

Song 3: Bette Midler – I’m Beautiful

“I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful,damn it!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful,damn it!
I'm beautiful, so beautiful, I'm beautiful, damn it!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful,damn it!

"Go away, little girl," they used to say.
"Hey, you're too fat, baby, you can't play."
"Hold on, miss thing, what you trying to do?
You know you're too white to be in our school."

Too white, too smart, too fast, too fine,
too loud, too tough, too too divine.
I said you don't belong. You don't belong.
Too loud, too big, too much to bear,
too bold, too brash, too prone to swear.
I heard that song for much too long.

Ain't this my sun? Ain't this my moon?
Ain't this my world to be who I choose?
Ain't this my song? Ain't this my move?
Ain't this my world? I know I can do it.

I'm not too short, I'm not too tall,
I'm not too big, I'm not too small.
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
I'm not too white, I'm not too black,
I'm not too this, I'm not too that.
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!
Ooh, don't lemme start lovin' myself!

I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, damn it!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, damn it!

It's time to call it what it is. Don't play the naming game.
Become what you were born to be and be it unashamed.
"Go away, little boy," I can hear them say,
"Everybody on the block says they think you're gay.
Hold on, my friend, do you think we're blind?
Take a look at yourself. You're not our kind."

Too black, too white, too short, too tall,
too blue, too green, too red, too small.
I said you don't belong. You don't belong.
Too black, too white, too short, too tall,
too blue, too green, too red, too small.
I heard that song for much to long.

Ain't this my sun? Ain't this my moon?
Ain't this my world to be who I choose?
Ain't this my song? Ain't this my move?
Ain't this my world? I know I can do it.

People always ask me,
"Miss M, how did you get so far?"
Well, I woke up one morning,
flossed my teeth and decided,
"Damn, I'm fierce!"
You can be just like me!
Don't just pussy foot around and sit on your assets.
Unleash your ferocity upon an unsuspecting world.
Rise up and repeat after me: "I'm beautiful!"

I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
Can you say that?
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
I don't hear you!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
Louder!
I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful, I'm beautiful!
Hey!

Ain't this my sun? My sun! Ain't this my moon? My moon!
Ain't this my world to be who I choose?
Ain't this our song? Ain't this our song?
Ain't this our movie? Ain't this our movie?
Ain't this our world to be who we choose?

You’re beautiful!